Bullying

Bullying is a very real threat in today's society.  I remember when I was a junior in high school.  We had an individual that was a person with special needs with his arms and legs.  He had had multiple surgeries from the time he was 5 until 15 and wanted so much to be "normal."  One day we had a scheduled fire drill during lunch.  We knew it would happen that day, but not when.  As we all raced toward the exit I saw my friend trying to slowly make his way out.  Three of the football players that I knew thought they were going to be funny and call a defensive play out loud and ram the opening of the doors.  So "bull, bull" was called and I watched them rush the doorway just to push people and have fun.  They did not realize and didn't care, but shoved 10 people into the door facing and my friend was at the door trying to get out.  His arms were shorter than everyone else's arms.  As he tried to reach for the door with his body the players came through.  He fell flat on his face because his arms weren't long enough to catch his body.  He got up fighting mad and the rest of us were fighting mad as well, because they didn't care who they hurt.  They were just being destructive.  You might not think this is bullying at all, but this was a situation where the perpetrators did not care if you were a certain color, gender, or special needs, they were proving they were dominant and could have fun at everyone else's expense.  They had repeatedly made fun of this boy due to his disability.  This would be in my opinion, bullying in the highest form, but back in those days no one got in trouble.  The administration knew it was a fire drill and in high school no teachers were involved because we were at lunch.  Let's imagine this was a real fire drill and there was a loss of life due to the players bullying behavior.  Would you hold those football players accountable for their actions?  My friend told administration that he and everyone at the door got shoved while trying to get out and they said this was just consequences of a fire drill because everyone was trying to get out.  Coincidentally two of the administrators were football coaches.  Everyone knew it was just a drill, due to the morning announcements, so there was no need to rush like this.  So my question to you is, is bullying for real, or is it just a drill?

Deer in Kentucky

Remember that it's that time of year where deer are running across the road and threatening to ruin your vehicle.  My wife experienced this first hand on Saturday when a deer came out of no where and leaped in front of her car, causing damage to the front end.  Thank goodness everyone was okay.  Vehicles can be replaced, but lives cannot.  This is just a reminder to keep an extra eye out for these creatures who may be lurking around the banks of the road and waiting to reek havoc on you and your vehicle.

What is Church?

What is Church?  Is it something that we consider four walls that we go to twice a week?  Is it a group of people Jesus talked about so many years ago?  I personally think that it is a group of people that get together, pray for one another, share each others burdens, learn and study His word, and meets in a home, hotel conference room, or a building, I believe that we have failed to fulfill the great commission.  He said to go and preach the gospel, pray for the sick, and take care of the widows and orphans.  We have a lot of widows these days, not due to death, but due to a lack of commitment in a marriage.  We have a lot of orphans for those that are not being taught about God. As the scripture says, "teach them the way they should go and when they're old they will not depart from it."  Times have definitely changed.  What the disciples wrote about that Jesus taught is so relevant today.  We just have to consider the meanings of the words He spoke and apply them to today's world.  We often get confused about why people act the way they do, or why we have to have a go fund me page when people are either sick or have lost something in their life, or for that matter, have to bury someone.  It should have been the church, the community of Christ to pick the slack up, but we have failed.  When there are kids in school without clothes, proper housing, or food at night, we have failed.  The biggest thing that disturbs me is that we are afraid to share who He is and why we believe what we do.  His greatest commandment was to love your neighbor as yourself.  We need to remember this and go be the church.

The Music City and What it Has Become

I remember as a kid growing up in TN, trips to Nashville, aka, the Music City.  We did not have a pro football team, Opry Mills Mall, or a professional hockey team, but there was plenty of music if you could find a place in hole in the wall bars or venues.  Back in those days, Opryland was the major attraction in Nashville.  It was a smaller version of Six Flags Amusement Park.  It had it all, rides, entertainment, and plenty of good food.  Also, you could go to the Grand Old Opry and see your favorite star performing on stage.  Now days, it has totally changed.  Investment bankers and attorneys started to see a rise in tourism so they capitalized on the situation.  They started buying poverty stricken properties and making them into condos or small subdivisions.  Football and hockey later joined.  Within 10 years, the town was up to 40 people per day moving to Nashville in 1999.  Today, its 80 people per day who move to Nashville, mostly those who are searching for music stardom, or musicians playing with high level artists.  The sad fact is that once they have exhausted their finances and resources pursuing the music dream,  they don't move, but stay in Nashville.  It has become overpopulated in a 10 year period to the point that where an old bar or venue used to be, it got bought out, and high rise condos are going in it's place.  What we used to know as Music City, has now become, as the locals call it, Nashvegas, the little city that never sleeps.

Amputation

I have a friend who had a knee replacement many years ago and has to have over 25 surgeries after this because of infections and skin graphs.  It has never been right after all of these surgeries.  People keep telling him to go on and cut it off.  He tells them, "it's not your leg.  If I have to get up and go to the restroom in the middle of the night I have to put on my leg. If I want to do anything that involves getting up, I have to put on my leg."  There are a lot of factors to consider when opting to amputate.  In his case, he may be able to live a fuller life with a prosthetic leg, since he is always busting his leg open and dealing with infection.  He is supposed to stay off of it most of the time, but for someone who is very active, this is really hard to do.  In his situation, a prosthetic leg may be preferable to his natural leg because he is so limited in what he can do with his natural leg since surgery.  However, I realize this is not my decision to make.  Remember that when giving "advice" to someone in this situation, you're not the one who has to deal with the consequences.  Be there for them, pray for them, and support them in whatever decision they make.  

Does Running Really Benefit Weight Loss

As a coach, I have been asked several times by players who hate to run, if running really help them as far as conditioning overall.  I have studied this subject for quite sometime.  I recently had one of my former students from 3 years ago come back to visit me a year after he had been in the army.  He said that they run for 3 days and are off for 2 days.  He has lost a total of 40 pounds in 6 weeks of basic training.  He said that without the running, he could not have accomplished the weight loss and the physical stamina he has now.  Then I had one of my former soccer players tell me that she had gained 25 pounds after soccer.  Typical soccer players in high school run an average of 5-7 miles per game.  She had stopped running after soccer.  She was disgusted with herself, so she told me that she started to run everyday like she used to in soccer conditioning.  She attributed her weight loss to running.  I know people that walk everyday and it does some good, but if you eat what you want 3 meals a day plus snacks and are not in a daily regiment of burning 500-700 calories a day, walking is not enough. So I believe that running, if you can physically handle it, is the best method for sustaining true weight loss and physical health.

Parent Volunteers

We kicked off our first rec soccer season this weekend with ages 5-16.  Rec soccer requires a lot of parent volunteers to coach and be commissioners for each town in our county.  It requires a lot of planning to make schedules, order shirts, pay for insurance, make a Sam's run for the concession stand, and clean the bathrooms when a muddy cleat trail is left behind.  Without these people, the program would cease to exist.  It never fails, that every year there are those parents who only want to complain about how their child doesn't have enough playing time or the ref made a bad call.  My question to them is always, "Do you volunteer to help this program?"  If not, you really don't have any room to complain.  Remember as the soccer season or a new sport begins in your local community starts, it runs mostly on volunteers who give of their time and money to help your child be involved in something they love to do.  If you aren't willing to help out to make the program a success, please don't complain.  It's all for the kids, not our own egos or opinions.

Should You Have to Get a License to be a Parent?

The thought of parents needing to get a license or permit to become a parent has crossed my mind as a machine tool teacher when I see parents who are not good to their children or don't take good care of them.  However, this is mostly just a snarky comment that I think in my head, but do not actually believe.  I think this should be left to God because even when it seems children are raised in a less than desirable home, they still have a purpose in life from God.  Many of these children rise above their circumstances and go on to be some of the greatest people in history.  It is not for us to decide who can or cannot become a parent.  Even when foster parents or adoptive parents go through an extensive screening process, they can still be bad parents.  This is evident all the time with children who are in foster homes where the foster parents are terrible to the children.  A license or permit does not mean that you will be good at something.  It only means you were good at passing the test or questionnaire that you were subjected to in order to pass the screening process. If we were to entertain this idea, where would it stop?  How many more things in our lives would the government try to control?  Being able to obtain a permit, does not make you a good parent.  Let's leave this one to God. 

Referees

Being a referee is definitely not the same as it used to be when I was growing up.  Sure there was the yelling in the stands at the ref, or coaches coming out, either on the field or on the court for a call they wanted to dispute, but the call was never reversed.  Referees have long been either loved or hated, every single game.  They have to go through extensive training in their sport.  They are the original instant replay because they have to take a virtual snapshot of everything happening in the game.  I have coached for years and I've had my share of disputing with the ref, but never have I witnessed or heard about the event that took place this past weekend at a travel team basketball game.  The ref was not only chastised and verbally abused, but the head coach of the team that lost, physically abused the referee to the point that it landed him in the hospital with multiple wounds to the face and head, where he suffered a concussion, a brain bleed, and a broken collar bone.  We still do not understand why coaches or parents get so upset during a game or what triggers it to the point of no self control.  Maybe it was the way they were raised or the lack of respect they had growing up at home.  Either way, if it doesn't stop, and the local and state officials do not get a handle on their coaches and parents, there won't be anyone left to call a game.  Remember the referees are real humans with feelings and families who are waiting for them to come home, too.  So the next time you're at your child's sporting event, remember to be respectful to the refs.

Music Playing Space

Anyone who has ever picked up an instrument and began to play in their room has probably always wanted a dedicated room in the house just for practice.  Being a drummer and keyboard player, there is a lot of equipment that needs space for these two instruments.  We recently tackled this endeavor and moved my oldest daughter, who is off at college, out of her space and into a room that we used to call the music room, but it was really just a bed and musical equipment surrounding it.  My youngest daughter, who plays guitar, and I tried our best to navigate around the mess and have practice time in this room, but it was always hard to do.  So we finally decided to create the room that we've always wanted.  My daughter could not believe that I had not had a place to practice my drums since before my wife and I got married.  I would either go somewhere to rehearse or use the mattress as a drum set.  I decided to retire my old drum set and put them in our new practice room, fully equipped with sound and a special place for my youngest daughter's guitar equipment and practice space.  Mind you there is still a bed in there, but the room is so big that we pay it no mind.  It's almost like a reminder of where we came from.  It might take a while to get your man cave, she shed, or garage, but the new music woodshed was worth the wait.

Gender Specific Toys

My youngest daughter, who is now 15, loved "boy toys" when she was younger.  She loved Scooby Doo, army men toys, guns, pirates, and things that would traditionally be considered toys for boys.  It was obvious though, that when we would check these items out at the store, she seemed a little embarrassed to purchase a toy that was supposed to be for a boy.  I think this is because gender norms are so engrained in our society that it is known what traditional girl and boy toys are without anyone even saying it.  I remember when she turned about 7 or 8, she wanted her first Barbie.  My wife and sister-in-laws were so excited she finally wanted a "girl toy," that they went crazy buying her Barbies.  Turns out, she only wanted them to play with her G.I. Joe action figures. Now that she is 15, she is interested in clothes, hair, and make-up, however she still likes things traditionally considered to be for boys.  Sometimes I think it is traditionally more socially acceptable for girls to play with "boy toys" than it is for boys to play with "girl toys."  We just call them tom boys.  There aren't as many nice names traditionally called for a boy who likes girls toys.  I think it is up to the parents to support their children in their interest because in today's world, you can do anything whether you're a man or woman.  Teach children to find what they are passionate about and where their God given talents lie, regardless of the gender norms. This will help them grow into happy, fulfilled adults.

Effects of Violent Video Games on Children

I'm in the process of researching the effects of violent video games on children as part of my college English class.  Have you ever wondered if video games can be harmful or helpful?  This topic is of interest to me as not only a parent, but as a teacher.  I see so many students come in tired to school because they have been up half the night playing video games.  According to the book Does Playing Video Games Make Players More Aggressive? by Barrie Gunter, violent video games can trigger aggression in children when they play frequently.  According to the book, children who played these games and then went to playtime mimicked some of the actions they used while playing the game.  In an interesting turn found in my research, prosocial, or helpful video games where the objective is to help or save someone, could cause children to be more helpful.  This makes me think that parents should really evaluate the content of the video games they are allowing children to play.  If they decide to let their children play violent games, limiting their screen time could cut down on some of the aggressive behaviors children display after playing, as it was found that aggression occurred more in children who played frequently.  So parents, don't let your child play mindlessly from the time they get home from school until bedtime.  Set some limitations for screen time and monitor what games your children are playing.  It could save you some unwanted behaviors in the future.

Storms

Welcome to Spring!  The time of year when new life comes back and everything starts blooming, reminding us that better days are up ahead.  I love this time of year.  The only problem with spring is that it also brings storms.  As a survivor of an F4/5 tornado in 2002, these storms always bring back a few scary memories.  With the last set of storms we've had this past month, I'm reminded just how powerful storms and strong winds can be.  I've had part of the shingles blown off to the roof of my shed, large tree branches knocked down, and the awning in my backyard threaten to be ripped out of the ground and blow away.  The good thing about these storms is that right behind them there are promises of calm, sunny, perfect days.  It kind of reminds me of life in general.  There may be a few storms you have to weather through, but the calm after the storm is always worth the trouble and we come out stronger on the other side.  Happy Spring!

Spring Break

As a teacher, spring break is one of the best times of the year and a gift you receive as a teacher.  It's the time where you've had a long stretch of working hard since Christmas and trying to get in all the last standards you are expected to cover.  It's a time when students and staff are all stressed trying to fit everything in before the year wraps up.  It's the time that's really the calm before the storm, since when you return, students and teachers will feel the pressures of deadlines and testing mandates.  So if you're on spring break this week, I encourage you to take some time for yourself.  Relax.  Enjoy your family.  Remember what matters most and take a little time for yourself.